I feel like the internet at large has turned into a howling/stomping ground of enraged fans (or maybe it’s just what you run into once you start getting into following film news)- and I hate to be the one to add to that mess. But I get so few chances to be an angry neckbeard (given that I’m pretty flush with estrogen) I figured that this was my moment.
That, and the fact that this trailer is blasphemous.
Why? You ask?
I’m no big fan of the original Dumbo. Actually, if you’ve read this blog for any period of time you might be aware that I can’t heard the song Baby Mine without sobbing. And that’s not the only seen of the movie that drives me to tears. Add to that the not-so-subtle racism with the jazzy crows and laborer roustabouts, and I can’t really say that the film is vindicated by excellent songs such as ‘Casey Junior’ (the train song), ‘Song of the Roustabouts’ (kind of hardcore for the House of Mouse), and ‘Pink Elephants on Parade’ (in which Dumbo gets drunk and hallucinates). No lie, I like all these songs.
But this film promises to one-up (one-down?) my feelings about the original Dumbo with a response of disgusted and mildly enraged ennui.
- Disney needs to stop making live action remakes. I haven’t liked any of them (maybe you have, if so, sorry) because they’re such bare-faced and obnoxious cash grabs that lose any sincerity of the originals in favor of extensive CGI and poor writing.
- Where is TIMOTHY MOUSE?!
- What the fuck is Colin Firth doing in here?
- Why are these humans… sympathetic? The human world of Dumbo is supposed to be harsh and foreign.
- Get rid of these simpering children.
- What on earth is this 50 Shades of Grey-esque cover of Baby Mine?
- This is a teaser trailer and it’s full trailer length.
- Ugh, it looks so Tim Burton. The only thing that would make it more Tim Burton is Helena Bonham Carter and Johnny Depp.
Guys, I’m not going to go see it. I only made it through Beauty and the Beast because I was on a plane. I failed to make it through The Jungle Book and Cinderella. Haven’t seen Maleficent.
I’m mid-viewing of There Will Be Blood and mid-studying after a kind of abortive trip to Paris. Never trust weather.com when it predicts no precipitation. Always bring your umbrella. Because if you don’t it will rain in the morning and snow in the afternoon.
- The top Welsh names in Wales. There’s something intriguing about Welsh names- from the enigmatic (to me) spelling and pronunciation to the Lord of the Rings- vibes. Not to mention names like Angharad and Gwilym- characters from one of my favorite films, How Green Was My Valley.
- Speaking of movies- an enjoyably extra idea for creating memorable movie nights for the family- themed invitations and menus.
- Remembering Hubert de Givenchy, a brilliant couturier and the designer most associated with Audrey Hepburn‘s rise as a sartorial star.
- This movie looks insane-in-a-good-way. Also excited to see Lakeith Stanfield in another role post-Get Out.
- I would watch a Jared Kushner musical.
- A visually beautiful article about the production of roses for Chanel No. 5. Via my Mom. (Also, I’ve been to Pegomas just this year!)
- Am I the only person who’s thought about what I want done with my body when I eventually and inevitably kick the bucket? This natural burial ground in Tennessee is actually closest to what I’ve imagined. Except god forbid my final resting place be Tennessee.
- Surprise surprise: A huge MIT study finds that fake news stories are much more likely to spread and go ‘viral’ than real news stories on Twitter. Kind of expected but no less scary for that.
- Having never been married and having no children of my own, I can’t realistically vouch for any of this advice- but I do like it.
- The mysteriously adorable allure of maternity overalls.
- Are intimately subtle, barely there perfumes having a renaissance?
- Taking down the single versus spoken for binary. “Does the idea that people have to “love” — or simply feel any specific way about being single — give the concept of romantic attachment too much power?”
- This French food waste law is changing how grocery stores approach excess food.
It’s been a weird weekend. And it’s only Saturday. Hopefully grocery shopping is uneventful tomorrow. One minute you’re sitting on the train and the next you’re disembarking and for some reason your right hip isn’t letting you walk?
Pretty sure I’m too young for hip replacement.
SO I was talking to some friends yesterday and said I would send along a list of recommended French films. And SO I figured I would post it since it’s a list.
That said, full disclosure: I haven’t seen every French film ever so this is a superbly and spectacularly incomplete list.
Let’s Start with animated:
- Ernest and Celestine: Bears and mice and based on a lovely children’s book series that I want to buy for my potential offspring.
- Nocturna: Amazing world building. So much imagination. Cats.
- The Boy with the Cuckoo Clock Heart: I walked in on dad playing music from this. He’s never seen it.
- A Monster in Paris: There’s a giant bug and it’s a beautiful heartwarming story. Also beautiful music.
Also kid-focused but not animated:
- Le Petit Nicolas: This is what being a child is like. But kind of more so.
I’ struggling with categorizing all the rest so I’m just going to throw them at you in one big lump:
- Belle de Jour: Catherine Deneuve is bored and fantasizes about BDSM so she decides to be a prostitute. Also her name is Severine, which is an excellent name.
- La Vie en Rose: Marion Cotillard is Edith Piaf and it’s as amazing as it sounds.
- Les Trois Couleurs: Three movies which you can kind of trace from the Nouvelle Vague style. Loosely connected, all individually perfect as stand-alones. I think Blue was my favorite.
- La Double Vie de Veronique: For some reason this hangs out with Les Trois Couleurs in my mind. Some lovely music.
- Huit Femmes: A Christmas musical murder mystery with a who’s who cast of great French actresses.
- Les Choristes: A teacher positively affects students lives through music. But it’s actually a good film.
- Bonjour, Tristesse: The book is better but this is nice and light and summery. Still not a huge Jean Seberg fan.
- The Intouchables: I always confuse this with The Untouchables, a film about taking down Al Capone. This is great too.
- Elle: Isabelle Huppert is bae and this Oscar nominee (did it win? I don’t remember) from last year is fantastic.
- Tous Les Matins du Monde: Music again. But also period drama stuff and sex.
- La Pianiste: Isabelle Huppert being sexy again. But this time even more mentally off-kilter.
- La Piscine: Romy Schneider and Jane Birkin and Alain Delon are all fabulously attractive people. And the film is suitably sexy.
- Les Enfants du Paradis: A long film that flew by. It’s actually a work of art and quite possibly one of the best films I watched last year. It is inspiring me to fall in love with a mime.
- Eyes Without a Face: French New Wave does Hitchcock. I am obviously a fan.
- Diabolique: More Hitchcockian stuff. A wife and mistress conspire to kill the guy. Then come strange events.
Weird stuff that I’m not sure I can recommend:
- Last Year at Marienbad: I will never forget the word ‘couloir’.
- Triplets of Belleville: What…?
Most of my movie watching is not new releases, so much as catching up on films that were once new releases but haven’t been from somewhere between a year to a century.
And they’re none the worse for that.
To be eligible for this list, the film must be one of my favorites that I watched in 2017 but NOT released this year.
- Shall We Dance (1937)
I can’t say enough about this film- one of the most beautiful Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers vehicles that I’ve ever seen. Highlights: Slap That Bass and Let’s Call the Whole Thing Off (roller-skates!)
- Kingsman: The Secret Service (2014)
I’ve already talked tons about Kingsman so I’ll keep this short. You’ll never think of Free Bird the same way again.
- 3:10 to Yuma (1957)
While the more recent version is good (particularly for a modern remake, that most justly maligned of categories) it still doesn’t really hold a candle to the absolutely masterful original- the frustrating but heroic town drunk (completely cut from the modern version), Van Heflin’s scrappy portrayal of Dan Evans, and above all Glenn Ford’s suave outlaw Ben Wade. Plus the song.
- Django Unchained (2012)
Tarantino’s films are very hit or miss for me, but Django Unchained was very much a hit. The cast is excellent, the plot is fun and exciting. Tarantino does his fun soundtrack thing.
- The Piano Teacher/ La Pianiste (2001)
This movie is beautifully repulsive. Basically a piano teacher (Heyyy Isabelle Huppert) conducts and affair with one of her students who believes that she is falling in love with him, essentially misreading the symptoms of her rapidly deteriorating sanity as signs of romantic obsession.
- The Hurt Locker (2008)
I had pretty much decided not to watch this because it looked a bit testosterone-heavy for me, but a confluence of circumstances led to me watching it and discovering that it is in fact a thoughtful and well-paced film with interesting characters and developments.
- La Piscine/ The Swimming Pool (1969)
Alain Delon is beautiful. So is Romy Schneider. So is Jane Birkin. So is summer.
- Les Enfants du Paradis/ Children of Paradise (1945)
This film had me absolutely spellbound for all 3+ hours of runtime. A theater mime is in love with a courtesan who is also beloved by three other, very different men- a pretentious actor, a conniving thief, and a rich count.
- Contracorriente/ Undertow (2009)
Contracorriente is my most recent addition to this list, having just watched it I think the day before yesterday. It’s a surreal and poignant ghost story in which a married fisherman has to find a way to reconcile two aspects of his life: his more conventional family life with his pregnant wife and his devotion to his male lover, a painter and town outcast.
Here’s to another year of good films!
Look at me doing two posts two days in a row like I don’t currently have 134 raw materials to study and an illness to recover from! 😀
No excuses, I have reaped enough links from the inter webs now to share them and I’m missing sharing my thoughts more often, so I’m going to work on making time for this blog/diary/list compendium more of a priority.
For the children, you know.
- Pixar’s released a TEASER TRAILER FOR INCREDIBLES 2! I’ve been waiting so long. And I am so ready for destructive apocalyptic Jack Jack and stay-at-home Mr. Incredible. (And Edna Mode. Please, Edna Mode).
- One of my favorite makeup artists (Violette, check out her youtube channel) has released a trio of lip colors with Estee Lauder. I’m sorely tempted.
- A scholarly discussion of Rankin & Bass Christmas specials; the good, the bad, and the ugly. Finally convinced me to finally watch Jack Frost, which I had somehow missed during all of my childhood ABC Family’s 25 Days of Christmas. Here are some highlights.
- A program to help you find the word that’s just on the tip of your tongue.
- Guys, there’s a new horse movie coming out, Lean on Pete.
- The American Film Institute has released their list of top 10 films of 2017. It’s a pretty good list. I’ve seen 4/10 so far, time to get cracking.
- Yale’s released a new admissions video, “That’s Why I Toured Yale”, replacing cult icon “That’s Why I Chose Yale”. The weirdest thing? I recognize people in the video. (I see you at 9:26-9:33, ballroom team!)
- NPR’s guide to the best books of 2017. Be right back, adding about 20 to my list. have you read any?
- New York Times film critics on the best movie performances of 2017. So much agreement and so much anticipation for films I haven’t seen yet (like Ladybird, The Shape of Water, and Call Me By Your Name).
- The magic of big cities, an illustration.
I watched the remake of 3:10 to Yuma last weekend and really enjoyed it much more than I was expecting to (insert horrible pun about eating crow/Crowe here). And it made me realize that Russell Crowe is actually a pretty good actor? And one that I kind of enjoy watching?
So I took a trip through his IMDb page to take a quick account of the films he’s done, what I’ve seen, and my final plus/minus sheet.
Watched and enjoyed:
- 3:10 to Yuma: Don’t get me wrong, this film is NOT as good as the original. And they change the ending. But it’s a good film, a good modern Western (and there are so few) (GUYS I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE HOSTILES), and the fact that he plays outlaw Ben Wade with a capability even approaching that of the legendary Glenn Ford… good on you Russ.
- A Beautiful Mind: Math O.O
- Gladiator: “ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?!” Reader, I was.
- LA Confidential: Yep, sure.
Watched and didn’t enjoy so much:
- The Nice Guys: Like LA Confidential, but irritating and worse.
- Les Miserables: Les Miserables is a great book. Les Miserables is a great film (1998, Liam Neeson, Geoffrey Rush). Les Miserables is a great musical. Les Miserables should not be a book turned into a musical turned into a film. It’s not sustainable. Hefty and overdone, tbh.
- The Insider: This was too ‘manly’ for me, honestly. Kind of like Se7en. That should be a separate list. I need to think about what it means to me when I call a film ‘too manly’. Because that’s not a helpful description, but maybe you get me?
Coming out of Dunkirk last week (guys, it’s amazing- go watch it (except for the erasure of everyone who wasn’t a white man from WWII)!) I was inspired to write a list of great war films.
When I got on it the next day I realized belatedly that war film knowledge is really a big gap in my film expertise. I haven’t watched most of the classics yet (Bridge on the River Kwai, All Quiet on the Western Front, Das Boot, Patton, etc.) and I couldn’t get more than a few minutes into Saving Private Ryan when I tried to watch it a few months ago. (It’s just so overblown and melodramatic).
My list would have been solely Hacksaw Ridge and Dunkirk, and we can’t have that- even if I do write movie pairing posts sometimes.
So I decided to ease into the subject with a genre I know a little (okay, a lot) more about- wartime romances.
My criteria were vaguely as follows: 1) There must be a war that actually took place in reality. 2) The plot must primarily follow some kind of romantic trajectory- the love story can’t be a secondary consideration, which rules out things like Hacksaw Ridge and Watch on the Rhine.
Be warned- it’s a bit of an eclectic list, but all are worthwhile in my book. Continue reading “Wartime Romance Films: All’s Fair”